Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
