I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
