He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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