You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
