There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
My life is pants optional.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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