I think I just saw someone hide a body.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Randomize
