so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
It's shark week go big or go home
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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