it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Drunk is not a location!
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize