I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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