I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
