we have officially mastered the walk of shame
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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