I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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