There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize