True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
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at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
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They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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