it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize