There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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