Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
