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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.

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• (386): View more from Florida

  That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.

  (954): View more from Florida

  Apparently hers is a theme park.

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• (805): View more from California

  I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?

  (1-805): View more from California

  Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit

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• (631): View more from New York

  After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch

  (1-631): View more from New York

  that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad

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• (914): View more from New York

  bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...

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• (415): View more from California

  He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE

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