I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
