Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize
