You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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