All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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