Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
