just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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