If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
