Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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