you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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