mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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