She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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