if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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