i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
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