puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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