I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
