Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
