Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
