Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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