my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize