Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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