Nicole vs. Life
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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