I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
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What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
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Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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