Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
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