i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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