We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize