Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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