and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
