So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Farmville is her only friend.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now