i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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