this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
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The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
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But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You are a genius and a whore.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I had to cum in my sink.
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