But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Randomize
