rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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