I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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