All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
